Everything Else is Extra

 “Teacher, which is the greatest commandment in the Law?”


Jesus replied, "Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.  This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: Love your neighbor as yourself. All the Law and the Prophets hang on these two commandments.”



Love God, love others; everything else is just extra.  I think we've all heard at least the first part of this phrase before.  I've heard it several times during the past couple days.  Mostly it's because I have two very understanding friends who are just fine with repeating it to me several times daily because I can't seem to get it through my head. I tend to worry about a lot of things.  Let's face it, I'm a perfectionist and a bit of a control freak!  I like to get things done on MY schedule, and I like to get them done MY way.  Sometimes I need to remember that I'm not the one in control.  God is.  Sure, I can do my part down here and do my best in school, but in the end it's up to Him to decide how my speech ends up coming out or if my studying will actually pay off for that bio test.  A grade, good or bad, does not determine my worth.  God will still love me, my mom will still love me, my dad will still love me, my brothers will still love me, my "sisters" will still love me, and my puppy definitely will still love me!  That doesn't mean I shouldn't care, but it means that life goes on no matter what.  That's a very good thing sometimes!


Relinquishing control is one of the hardest things for me to do, but this year a lot has been changing for me.  I've been learning that I simply cannot control everything.  I can't control my homework, I can't control my roommates, and I can't even feel somewhat in control and drive off places anymore in my car to escape for a while.


I've also been learning that life isn't going to always go on my schedule.  I love having a regular schedule to follow, and at home that was always hard to do.  My family would always have things going on that would get in my way.  I was actually looking forward to leaving home just so I could finally have my own life and run things according to my schedule.  That still doesn't work though because while I may not have my actual family dictating what I do with my days and nights, I have a new "family" here that keeps me just as busy, if not more.  And this is a good thing.  Sometimes I may not be able to go to bed on time because my sister needs to talk or wants to practice bassoon until late hours, and sometimes I end up staying in the library with a brother a little longer than expected.  But in the end, I know God has truly blessed me with these people in my life, and I would sacrifice my schedule for them anytime.  


To sum up this rather rambly entry, I suppose I'll just say one more time how grateful I am to be at this school learning these things.  It was quite the journey to get here, and I'm glad that God has this place written into the next four to five years of my life.  I can't wait to see what else He has in store for me here.  It may not always be what I want or expect, but I'm ok with that.  Life would be pretty boring if I got to decide everything :)